goodbye

GOODBYE.



well, some updates.
ive failed my chemistry paper by 1 mark, and hopefully there'll be moderation.
hmm, a little bit disappointed (or maybe alot?), a little awkward (to tell my family about my results), a little ashamed, but not at all guilty.
i would say ive really put in alot this time, tried my best but maybe havent done my best.
definitely, i wouldnt hope this is my best. i always in poor exam conditions, the mind isnt prepared for the speed and for the kind of stress. took quite some time to warm up during the paper, and panicked when time's almost up. this is bad, and im going to find a cure for it, somehow, on my own (:

hah, the maths paper, is another disappointing one. left the last qn completely blank which worth like 17 marks? hah, thats a difference between 2 grades?
havent get back the results but some sort of prepapred for the disaster.

what else can i hope for, other than having myself believing that i cant do better, for the teachers to see some kind of effort that ive put in, for the family to understand that im trying?

for the first time of my life, im feeling like this - weak, lousy and simply inferior.
i remained optimistic because i know im fortunate compared to others, in some way or another.
hah, this is what i feel after watching the show "one litre of tears", thanks to melvin and willy for the intro. totally salute the girl in the show for her determination, courage and positive attitude. im not trying to be like her, but im kinda motivated by her.

there's more that i can do than to just cry over my results.
i still have 2 more chances (:

shall be stronger than yesterday, & i promise to work harder.
wait, i hate promises, i will work harder would be better.

and oh, i like the photo below. it's me and carmen. i edited it to make it look nicer (cause i appeared like shit before editing. HA)

okay, time for dinner.
im feeling better. WEE~